Friday, January 13, 2012

Investment Advice From Parking Meters?

I got an insider investment tip from a parking meter today and thought I would share.

How To Make The Big Bucks

Like any parking meter will tell you,
the cash is in the tips
but change is where it all adds up
to make accountants flip.
Invest in parking meters
We promise you'll do great.
We work the longest hours
and never are we late.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Low Down No Count No Space Parking Lot Blues

That's right, while most of America vacations the parking problems simply move from our cities to our recreational areas while everyone in the nation ignores the fact that if every car and truck in America were to be parked all at once the streets and highways would be forever blocked with parked cars and trucks. And with that I bring you today's installment of Poems By Parking Meters, Parking Meter Poetry.

Parkin' Meter Blues

Parking meters everywhere
but not a slot for you.
You ride 'n ride from side to side
you got the parkin' meter blues.
Had you given yourself more time
you could have beat the bunch
but as the parking meters stand
you'll be ridin' until lunch.

And you forgot to bring any change.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

FBI Busts Parking Meter Bandits

Meters Turn State's Evidence
(or Parking G-men?)


Don't rip us off-- we'll get you
and we will surely win.
The change ain't worth the price of sin
and then we'll do you in.
In Baltimore or Buffalo, the man is watching you.
And we'll be there to tip him off
and tell him what is true.

Yes, my friends, the long arm of the law even extends to parking meters and they don't like getting ripped-off. This has been a special report from PMN.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Vegas Parking Meters Gamble On Success

There's Not Room Enough In This Town...

Some call it South Park,
some call it surplus,
some call it Sin City
and call it a plus.
But we call it tragic,
what they plan to do:
Get rid of us
to make room for you?

We'll not stand for it!

And so it is, while the City of Las Vegas burns in the Mojave, ordinarily silent parking meters speak out against rate increases and lay offs. Hey, parking meters have rights...

Somewhere On A Darkened Street

Lonely Parking Meter

Here I sit alone again
my slot a gaping hole.
My space is open far too wide
as I sit atop my pole.
Alone again, like every night
I'll see you again come day
but if you really cared for me
you'd pay so you could stay

all night long.